Sometimes we ask for space for the wrong reasons.
Here’s when asking for space might not be the right thing to do.
Space is essential to reconnect with oneself. It is healthy to take a step back and reflect or cool off. When someone asks for space, they; seek autonomy in decision-making, gain control, treat themselves, get a better sense of self, and spend time on their own, among other personal needs.
But sometimes we might find ourselves reaching for personal space for the wrong reasons.
Here are six instances space might harm you rather than help you:
1. Social influence
We cannot underestimate the influence of our peers in this era. Once something starts to trend or a number of people in your social circle practice it, it is easy to be influenced. Don’t isolate yourself because it is fashionable if it is not right for you.
On the other hand, don’t isolate yourself to make people miss you. If you feel too exposed or overly available in certain circumstances, find meaningful ways to be present and engaged.
2. Reflex
If your need for space is chronic, you might want to find out why. Usually, there is a set of circumstances that trigger your need. Try to understand what sends you off in the shadows. If it is a coping mechanism, it is not sustainable for personal progress and relationships.
3. You need to connect
Sometimes when we want to space is when we need to connect. Before you write off everyone for space, figure out if there’s someone you need in particular and if there are other conditions in which you want to connect. It is a common belief that space is for everyone in your life. This is not true and can cause unnecessary feelings of loneliness.
4. You don’t know your boundaries
Need for space once in a while is necessary. If you never ask or get space, it may signal poor personal boundaries, because you don’t know how to ask for it or don’t think you need it. On the other hand, a persistent need for space can also show that you don’t have or know your boundaries.
At the bottom of it, you may feel stressed out or overwhelmed because you stretched yourself too far and now you are on a crash course that requires you to have space often.
5. You’re afraid of speaking up
Asking for space can also be a way of avoiding confrontation, and difficult conversations, and addressing things that bother you. So space can give you a sense of control when in reality you are hiding.
6. You need to rest
Space can be synonymous with rest when overstimulation kicks in. If you fail to get enough rest in your routine, space will not cure your bad habits. Taking care of your health goes hand-in-hand with your daily activities.
In this case, getting space will simply give you more time to indulge in bad habits rather than rest like your body might be telling you.
Takeaway
Taking time for yourself is a personal choice and need, but you should practice regulation. Find out where your need for space is arising from and act accordingly.