Did Father’s Day bring up bad memories?
Maybe you couldn’t relate to the pleasant stories you read about people and their fathers.
If it made you feel bad and it brought up unpleasant memories, here are some things to know;
1. An absent father does not mean you did something wrong
Subconsciously, you might feel like your dad left you because you are not good enough or you did something wrong, but it was never about you.
It’s okay if you don’t know why he left and know there was nothing you could have done to make him stay. Disassociate yourself from his actions and need for his approval.
2. Your bad father doesn’t mean all men are bad fathers
Don’t feel that all men are bad. There are some really good men out there and don’t let that change your perception of the male specie.
For every Future, there is a Russell Wilson. (Singer Ciara’s ex husband Future is known to be toxic and absent, she left him for Russell Wilson who is a caring hand-on father)
3. A good father could also be a bad husband
Was your father a bad father or a bad husband? There is always a difference.
So think about it, did he treat your mom wrongly? That’s not to excuse his actions, but maybe he was there for you if you recall properly.
4. If your father died young, he loved you while he was alive
Perhaps, you cannot relate to Father’s Day at all because your father died and you have no memories of him. Know that he loves you.
Be comforted by the knowledge that your mother was there for you but if she wasn’t there for you, then know that your parents would have been there for you if they had the chance.
5. You can be a better father or marry one
No matter how you were treated by your father, think of your future (or present) family. Think of the kind of man you will marry, the kind of father you will be. You have the chance to give so much love to your children.